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Admittance

by Chapels

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1.
As I sit on the corner, the cold night air biting at my fingertips, stars stare down at your head resting on my shoulders. Breath condenses in clouds formed as a promise which could never be kept. Walking away is the hardest part, and each breath seems a tighter restraint holding me down. Wandering back, the hundreds of solitary lights reflect a loneliness which cant only be felt whilst in a crowd; an admittance: We only did this to ourselves We only did this to ourselves….
2.
Lighthouse 01:45
I’m the son of regret and rejection and I’ve lost my only sense of direction So I’ll take my best known detour Find myself back at home to feel reassured I’ve been searching for years, faced up to all my fears Looking for the one who I can hold dear But my hands are tied in a lovers’ knot And I’m sick of searching for what I’ve already got: An ever present sense of failure I’ll never be quite what you’re looking for Searching; Longing for You
3.
Six months wasted with tired eyes, trying to see through all your lies But beggars can’t be choosers, so I chose another way… You were never what I wanted You were never ever ever what I needed Second choice to a whore and a thief Six months lost to a whore and a thief You were never what I wanted
4.
This city’s choking me but all I do is sit here quietly I cannot see the sun and Nobody cares any more I’m suffocating in this town To think I grew up here just gets me down I’ve never seen the stars and everyone has given up Our achievements will amount to nothing, we’ll cast all our fears out to sea We’ll stand bare and alone in just our flesh, forget all we wished to be These are our dying days of youth, These are the kids we will have been We won’t just sit back whilst you lie We won’t forget the things we’ve seen
5.
As a blanket of dew forms over dead grass, eyes open: Eyes burdened with guilt and regret, weary with days. After several minutes of thought, he rises. Blistered fingers trace over unkempt stubble plaguing his cheeks; He sighs, as if to evoke pity from only the air around him. Her eyes never closed in the first place, losing their hours staring at the blank canvas of ceiling, mapping every flake of old paint as her hair formed her face a frame on the sheet. The thought of reconcile seemed distant, but the way they used to smile, she missed it. As the architects of their own misery, shame hung over both like a black cloud. During this emotional demise, he found god, and fell apart, pushed into new beliefs in which he had little trust. She, on the hand, found a new partner and got on with her life. This is where she leaves the story, in our heads at least. But he never forgot; he created their future in his head and re-ran old memories as if on tape, wiping parts to static and inventing his own fantasy over them. He still felt her presence, and this is what made him go mad. 974 days crossed off, tallied in notches on the desk; I remain broken by the incident and have spent months trying to piece myself back together, purely because of your jealousy.
6.
Bridges 03:49
Every night I think of it, and every night I try To pry my busy mind away, seeking ceaselessly to say I couldn’t Bear to breathe another hopeless word, my fractured lips would fall To pieces in the dirt, tired of all this hopeless hurt; I never Said that I could do it Never said that I was strong I never had the chance to opt out when I knew that I was wrong. I couldn’t bear to try another time to settle all my scores I’ll never end up fighting my own personal wars I swear these bones will never fracture under the petty indignation of abuse, and if we ever find ourselves hand in hand – what we’ll become, oh, what we’ll become! We’ll burn those bridges down…. She said Did it hurt you like it hurt me, hurt my friends and hurt my family? Did you think it would all be fine if you just left me Alone Apart Afraid Of what I Could do?
7.
Haunts 03:45
The longest nights, the saddest days will come to haunt me come what may And after all of this all that you do is come for me again And when I’m cold, when I’m disheartened I will think of you and I will hear your voice in my head, I won’t fall apart again. I cast my fears beside me, I forgot everything you’d done One day we’ll meet again my dear, our broken hearts will become one. I’ve got things I haven’t told you, I’ve got things I’ve never said But I gave up that chance just to be with her again I’ve never been as lonely as this I gave it all up for just one last kiss. Hopelessness Fearlessness Lovelessness Listlessness I’ve seen my Reflection And things aren’t Looking good I would try A second time But I can’t Close my eyes These old haunts Fading away
8.
With all our honesty laid to rest I’m wasting time trying to do my best. No god could make me afraid of what I’ve done, No devil of what I’ve become But I’m not even sure that what I’m doing’s right And no one understands when I stretch out my hands Going back on my words Acceptance undeserved I’ve been four thousand miles away and felt more at home than here If there’s no importance in what I have to say I have nothing left to fear…
9.
I could never apologise for expectations failed I used to have hope but since that ship has sailed We drown our best ideas in alcohol And choke them out with cigarettes We’ll give up on our dreams Give in to regrets Give up on our dreams, Give in to regrets
10.
I touched her soft skin like trying to hold smoke, like grasping at a ghost; I scream inside just thinking about her. These nights I lay sleepless, my dreams a picture of the past, and she’s the frame, holding me together, its holding all the same. I thread my fingers through her hand, and she knits hers back, but I’m torn away, I fade away like dust in a storm. And her green eyes stay fixed on the space like gazing at a ghost.

about

Debut album by London-based band Chapels, displaying a vigorous mix of screamo, spoken word and melody, rivalled by few as young. Admittance contains ten tracks of raw energy and emotion, a fast tirade through the band's history.
INCLUDES LOTS OF DIGITAL GOODIES TOO.
GET SAD.

credits

released August 20, 2012

Oliver Doe - Vocals
Keenan Burgess - Guitar
Jack Adams - Drums
Tom Barrie - Bass

All lyrics by Oliver Doe, All music by Chapels
Recorded by Joe Edwards June-August 2012
Additional Vocals by Joe Edwards and Sam Kubrick of Shields
Additional Synths by Joe Edwards
Additional Vocals on Bridges and All That Glistens is Not Gold by Keenan Burgess
Mixed/Mastered by Joe Edwards
Percussion on Track 10 by Ollie Doe, Keenan Burgess & Joe Edwards

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about

Chapels London, UK

Chapels is a post-hardcore band from London, UK, formed in 2011. We released our first demo in June '11 which can be downloaded for free. We write passionate yet abrasive songs that we hope people will enjoy hearing.
August 2012 brought the release of debut album "Admittance", a culmination of over a year's work.

Ollie Doe - Vocals
Keenan Burgess - Guitars
Tom Barrie - Bass
Jack Adams - Drums
... more

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